They warned me to not expect to achieve anything. They said to get rid of any grand ideas that I would be the one to make a difference. I was never expected to make a change. 

Photos of Auki……

Of course, I ignored it all. Selfishly, I hoped to leave a legacy. Naively I thought I would be the one who would be different, who would make a difference. 

But I am not special and I am not unique. My assignment played out exactly to the tune that we had all been told. 

Not all work……

My first three months were full of inspiration, my fourth a pit of hopeless doom and gloom, my halfway mark saw clarity in my role, by nine months time was running out, at eleven everything was futile, my goal unachievable. 

Zumba Auki Style…… 

About a month ago I received an email from my volunteer agency. I am told it is normal to feel a range of emotions. Sadness, guilt or regret about leaving, perhaps excitement about returning home or even relief that the experience is over. I am advised that I will feel lost. I will experience reverse culture shock and readjustment stress. Mostly I will have difficulty reconnecting with friends and family and it’s best that I don’t expect anyone to be interested in hearing about my time as a volunteer. 

Food in the Solomons…….. 

I remember thinking at the time that maybe I don’t want to go home after all. Home sounds like a horrible place to be, my life dull and mundane, my friends cruel and uncaring. Of course I ignored it all. This was not going to happen to me. My life is different, my friends are different, I am different.  

Travel in the Solomons (never easy) 

Again, I have been taught a lesson about my own arrogance and naivety. My emotions and my actions have been textbook. But my friends. My friends have been amazing and I’m not sure I would have liked to spend the last fortnight anywhere but here. 

Traditional Solomons……. 

The initial relief I felt was enormous. I had not realised how hard I had been clinging on to some hope that there would be a light at the end of the tunnel. Unfortunately the only light was an exit sign but I was more than happy to leave. There was nothing more that I could do. 

I have been back three weeks now. I spent two curled in the fetal position on a friends sofa. I watched back to back movies and ate all foods I have missed. I went on bike rides, road trips and long walks in the cold. I thought these were all the things that would make me feel better but I only felt lost, a huge sense of loss and I missed my crazy past life. 

Views of the Solomons…… 

But it is, of course, all about the journey, not the destination. I maybe feeling weary and a little sore right now but I will soon only remember the good times. I believe that I have grown as a person, I have learnt that I am capable of more than I ever imagined. I have met inspirational mentors and amazing friends who I hope will remain in my life for a long time yet. But mostly, I am inspired to find out what is next on this crazy journey that is my life. 

Its the friends you make…..

Onwards and upwards. 

So what is next? I have my life packed up in the back of my car and I am five days into an epic journey that will take me from Melbourne to Western Australia, exploring the Eyre Peninsula and the Nullarbor along the way. I have a job in a small hospital in Southern Cross and I’m excited to be getting back to nursing. As I am writing this, I am washing down Coffin Bay oysters with a crisp Port Lincoln Sav Blanc, wrapped in a blanket as I watch the sun set over the bay. So please, don’t feel sorry for me. I am a survivor and as I always say: Everything is going to be OK. 

So, I will leave you with my farewell speech. I think it gives a simple summary of the last year: 

My Last Days ……..

For those of you who don’t know why I am here, my volunteer assignment was to develop an education programme to help build competency in the nursing department.

Building competency in healthcare is a mammoth task. It is a task which starts at the beginning of your training and never ends. It is a task that is not just about learning practical skills. It involves theory and ethics and morals and critical thinking and common sense and emotions and values and religions and beliefs. There are never two days the same. How do you teach that to a whole hospital in one year? 

I went back and forth between the Solomon Island Nursing Council and the Ministry of Health to find out how they wanted to assess competency. Nobody had any idea so I decided to look at my own experience. I am registered in both the UK and Australia. Every year, I have to sign a declaration to say that I have completed at least 150 hours of Continuing Professional Development. 
Healthcare is forever changing. We are constantly discovering new treatments, new procedures, new diagnostic tests, new cures and unfortunately new infections and new diseases. As a nurse, when we qualify, we commit to a career of lifelong learning. How can we deliver the very best care to our patients if our knowledge and expertise is not kept recent and relevant? This is an essential and fundamental part of the nursing pathway and it is one, that by the true nature of our calling, only we are responsible for.

3 hours a week. That is all they asking for. Sounds easy. Right?

This year has been the most the most frustrating yet the most wonderfully fantastic year I have had in my life so far. It has been a rollercoaster of emotions, a year of high highs and low lows. As I have been teaching over the last year, all feedback should be constructive and should  always end on a positive note, so bare with me as I share my frustrations. It gets better, I promise.
I decided to start with clinical placements. The main purpose of this was to get know you, to understand how you work and to hopefully discover the best ways to help you learn. Your shyness was so painful to see, your discomfort at having me there so palpable that I struggled to break through. This I believe has been my biggest and highest hurdle and I am aware that many of you are still unsure, possibly even afraid of me. Even now, as I walk into a room, the silence is deafening. I am just an ordinary nurse like you and I promise, I don’t bite.
The next plan was to motivate and empower the ward supervisors. The education team sit in an office, we are removed from the clinical environment. We can give you the training and the tools you need, but we need someone to take responsibility for delivering education on a daily basis in the clinical area. We ran a three day workshop on assessing competency, clinical teaching, constructive feedback, reflective practice and the importance of CPD. We gave you the tools and the response was brilliant. Then nothing.
You all said you wanted help in understanding research papers. I started a research reading group and posted papers on the board every week. Every Friday for 6 weeks I sat in the classroom and no one came.
I tried to increase motivation for CPD in the ward areas by developing Education Link Nurses. I would train them in research and help them to develop short trainings that were relevant to their own ward area. A fantastic response was received but once again, no-one came.
I trialled clinical skills workshops in the maternity classrooms. A drop in session that would take less than 30 minutes that would run whenever you were free. Nobody came.
I tirelessly encouraged staff again and again to come to The knowledge lab and sign up to one of the hundreds of on line courses we have. A wealth of knowledge is waiting at your fingertips, an amazing resource that I can’t believe is wasted. I know you are unsure of computers but I was always there, happy to teach, happy to help. To the few that came, I applaud you. An hour is all it takes. Don’t be shy, give it a try! I have prizes.
Every Wednesday I held a clinical meeting for an hour. Time and again, I sat alone in an empty classroom. Those times when people did come the feedback was always positive. I was told: we need to know this. We should be doing this in our clinical area.
But I’ll leave it there, I think by now I have made my point. 

But it has certainly not been all doom and gloom. Far from it. I would like to mention that there are a few good tales to tell.
We have four nurses, and it’s been a tough start, but if they work hard and put in the time, they will end 2018 with a Diploma in Child Health.
We sent more than 10 scholarship applications off for nurses to study for post graduate diplomas and masters in Australia and I look forward to hopefully meeting some of you over there next year. 
I have been motivated by the enthusiasm that the younger nurses have for education. I hope you keep this up and I hope that everyone encourages them in this, especially the ward supervisors.
Our ADON, Richie, has completed many online education courses and is the only one who has taken not one, but two prizes. If he can do it, so can any of you.
And I can’t leave it without mentioning Leon and the upcoming Audit Symposium. Leon has shown a drive and a passion for improving practice through research and has been instrumental in the development of this programme. I am proud to say that we have completed stage one and have 5 audits already included. I’d like to share some of the results with you.
Joana and the children’s ward have been using reflective practice to learn from each child death. It has been a great learning experience and we have already seen improvements in the care given. We highlighted lots of areas for improvement and education. As a result, we have arranged a team of Australian paediatric doctors to deliver workshops in August.
In the Education department, Isaac and Julie have found huge gaps in our documentation and handover practices. This was resulting in clinical errors and harm to our patients. Hopefully the workshops they are about to deliver (if anyone shows up) and the development of hospital polices will improve this vital part of nursing practice.
Morris looked at absenteeism in the psychiatric unit and found that over a two week period more than 40 work hours were lost due to lateness. This is the equivalent of 5 shifts not worked. I think you’ll all agree that is a huge problem that exists througout the hospital. Hopefully Morris and his team will be able to improve this by next year. Finally, Leon and Roland have been working together to improve the quality of sputum sampling for TB patients. Leon found that nurse’s knowledge on the standards of practice was extremely low, with nurses unable to say how, when and why we take sputum samples. Possibly as a result of this, Roland found that less than 35% of samples received in lab were collected according to guidelines and that 65% were of an insufficient quality to process. They have developed a new policy and hopefully through education and training we will start to see a reduction in the mis diagnosis and mis treatment of TB patients. A highly worthwhile study.

I’d like to mention that as a result of this, both Leon and Roland have applied for a research fellowship to be completed here, in Malaita province. With the help and support of James Cook University they have a real chance to start reducing TB rates. I’m sure you will join me in a huge clap and wish them the best of luck.
Of course, I can’t go without sharing the fun times and the happy memories we have shared along the way.
The first has to be the fundraiser. It’ll be fun they said! A good laugh they said. All I can say is it was an experience I am not sure I want to repeat. Drunken men licking my hand is not my idea of a fun evening. But! We raised enough money to send ten of us to the south pacific nursing forum.
This was a great week, in particular was the chance to be involved in the custom dancing. The pictures and the memories from this I will keep and share forever.
The trip to south Malaita with the Maternity team. Malaita is one the most beautiful places I have ever lived and to see it with you guys made it extra special so thanks, for an amazing adventure. I will not mention the horrendous journey home but I do recall lying on my back, on a jetty, singing songs to the sky as the sunset. Happy memories.
And last but not least was collecting the pigpig for my leaving party. I laughed until I cried. Thank you all for making this such a good night to remember you all by.
So, I think I am finally done.
But I cannot go without a massive thank you to both Julie and Isaac. It has not been an easy year for you. I have invaded your office space, increased your workload and continuously moaned and complained. You have taken this all in your stride and I thank you for that.
Isaac, I apologise for always bossing you about and I can imagine you have had many an evening letting off steam to Nester. To Nester, I apologise for sending your husband home grumpy. I hope I have managed to teach you at least something and that you remember me for the times we laughed and the fun we had. I wish you all the best in whatever journey you choose to take from here
Julie. You have been my guide and my mentor. I have been warmed by your friendship and humbled by your humility. Although my role here was to help you, I believe you have taught me so much more. I appreciate your vision, your drive and your motivation. I see you work tirelessly to try and improve things here, I feel your frustration and I am amazed at your resilience. A huge thankyou to you. I will always sing your praises and I will never forget you.
And here, at last, I will finish and I will bid you a fond farewell and an assurance that you will always be in my heart and never forgotten. Thankyou.